Breasts/Body Image

I have always been self conscious about my body, as do most people (especially females). I'm sure it has to do with a variety of things: family and friends influences by making comments, how media portrays the ideal image in magazines, movies, television, etc., a personal mental block and unacceptance of my own body, etc etc.

I recently decided to look up "normal breasts" online. I've seen the many "perfect" boobs in movies and on pornographic sites, and I always felt that mine were so ugly in comparison. I always wondered why mine were the way they are. I felt that I was cursed with the not-so-ideal body.

After conducting my search, I found an interesting site that truly opened my eyes to things. It's a fairly simple site that is not glamorous or completely grammar-perfect. But the information is PRICELESS. It talks of how media portrays the ideal image of breasts and that that's all we see growing up, so it's only natural that we would compare ourselves with media images. It talks of how the breast's natural purpose is to feed babies and shouldn't be primarily a source of sexual stimulation. It talks of how the main reason that boobs are such a huge turn on for men is due to the fact that we are so sheltered from normal breasts. We grow up as children being taught that we shouldn't look at boobs and we rarely see them. We grow up and see them more because we have movies and internet. But the problem is that when searching online for boobs, you will mainly find pornographic material. And we all know how very fake and unreal these people are. So we gain an unrealistic view of how bodies should look (as well as how sex should be).

So anyway, I learned a lot from this site (007b.com), and have been on my own personal journey of accepting myself. I'm slowly accepting my breasts/body as it is (although it's a long and hard process).

I also was recently invited to a book club/discussion group that focuses on women's issues. We'll read essays and books that involve woman positive stuff as well as discuss other topics such as feminism. I'm excited about it and really hope that it kicks off soon.

It's been a while...

Nine months, to be precise.

I'm sure it would take too long to update on all activities from the last 9 months; however, not much has happened anyway.


So, Jacob moved out here in the middle of January. He hopped around to different hotels/extended stays until he finally found a little apartment in San Marco (which has been flooding a lot lately due to these crazy storms).

I don't know... Things have been great with us. There have been several arguments and over dramatic nights, but we've been getting closer and learning to love each other despite some annoying features.

Jake had problems with money since the beginning because he tends to overspend or just spend on unnecessary items, and it's been kind of a continual problem up until recently. But he's working it out. So that's good.

Things with me... I chose not to attend school this semester because I wanted a break. And it's been so nice. But I haven't been working either, so my money has been dwindling. But I'm planning on attending UNF in the Spring, my major being English and possibly a minor in Studio Art (I'd like to write stories and possibly illustrate them). And I just interviewed with Scholarship Experts yesterday, and that seemed to go well. So hopefully I'll get a job soon.

Not sure what else to say.

I'm mad at myself for not keeping this updated. It's the only way I can remember what I've done, since my memory sucks.

Anyway, I will try to keep this up better. And if I remember any other updates, then they will be added.

:)